Three Stages of Communication from David Deida

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Episode 277: In this podcast episode, Madelyn Moon helps you to understand the three stages of communication introduced by David Deida. According to David Deida, an international teacher and author, there are 3 stages of relating. These stages govern how we share our desires and feelings in this world with the most important people in our life.

Madelyn has been living her life by these stages of communication for the past two years. She's becoming more empowered and embodied by this work, leading to deeper, fulfilling relationships, as well as more fun and a playful nature. She's never taught this information before as she wanted to fully become immersed it in well enough to articulate it, but it's time she passes this juicy information on to you to transform and heal your current relationships.

Through this brief introduction and the several examples that she gives, you'll understand how to love deeper, express yourself fully and give your greatest gifts in your relationships.

Show notes: 

  • Stage 1:

    • Archetype - The 1960's submissive housewife and the macho breadwinner.

    • This stage is what we experience most of the time in this world.

    • It's our old wounds/trauma being reenacted over and over. 

    • "Repressed, shut-down archetype" — we're given a role and we have to stick with it.

  • “Withholding is not how we create loving, deep partnership.” 

  • How to share your truth so that the person is magnetized by you. 

  • Stage 2:

    • Archetype - The working girl and the sensitive boy.

    • “I” statements—speaking from your perspective.

    • "When this happened, I felt..."

    • Very communicative… you feel a trigger and you’re upfront about it.

  • Stage 3:

    • Archetype - the radiant goddess and the warrior of love.

    • You bring your gift of creativity and embodiment to your partner— you take the focus off of you. 

    • This is where polarity comes from. 

  • Masculine’s nervous system is really thick because they’ve had years of being desensitized. 

  • Example: wanting your partner to help you clean. 

  • Feminine: there’s never enough love.

  • Masculine: there’s always so many burdens.

  • “Give the thing that you would like to receive.”

  • How to make people-pleasing light and fun: “I’m a very bad girl.” 

  • Masculine Haka dance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yiKFYTFJ_kw

Connect with Maddy:

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