3 Ways Embodiment Heals Faster than Affirmations

Two years ago, I wrote a Facebook post saying I was ready to call in a teacher to take me deeper in my Feminine and Masculine studies. I wrote something like, “I already know a great deal about it, so whomever will lead me must have extensive knowledge and be more of a “teacher” than a coach."

(Bless me — I did not know much about it. And I would soon come to learn that)

Low and behold, the goddesses bestowed upon my cocky little head two wise teachers that I ended up studying with for the following two years.

They were introduced to me as embodiment teachers — which is one of the names I have since taken myself. At the time, though, I had no idea what that truly meant.

Embodiment, according to the dictionary, is a tangible or visible form of an idea, quality or feeling.

Here are some examples:

  • If you were to embody confidence, you could bring your hands to your chest and pretend to rip open your shirt like Clark Kent as he morphs into Superman.

  • If you were to embody sadness, you could begin to cry and let your shoulders convulse.

  • If you were to embody your inner brat, you could stomp your feet and stick out your tongue.

  • If you were to embody anguish, you could wail, fall to the floor, open your heart and scream “why!?” into the sky.

  • If you were to embody presence as you hold space, you could breathe into your lower belly deeper.

EMBODIMENT, SIMPLY PUT, IS TO USE YOUR BODY TO BECOME/DEMONSTRATE SOMETHING WITHIN.

It’s not just getting in your body.

"Getting in your body" could mean doing yoga or feeling an orgasm.

Those will certainly move you out of your standard logical, analytic state, but it’s not the same as consciously using your body as a tool for subconscious reprograming.

The new age world spends a lot of time talking about thoughts. And thoughts are important, it’s true.

“What you think about you bring about.”

“You are what you think about.”

“If you can think it, you can achieve it.”

And so on.

I myself have spent a lot of time writing down mantras and repeating affirmations. For at least two years, I woke up every morning and wrote down “I am so happy and grateful now that I make $15,000 per month. Money loves me. Money is everywhere” over 20 times in my journal while also listening to a money meditation. And to no surprise, $15,000 started to not feel like very much. So then, once the “oh I could never make that!!” fear started to dwindle away, I started to create that very amount. I soon upped the amount I wrote down, and so on. It works.

That said, there are things that run much deeper than manifesting money, a boyfriend or a new car. And if you don’t target those things, no amount of money will ever make you happy or will ever stay in your bank account. It’s the subconscious beliefs and feelings that are ruling your life.

Enter, embodiment.

EMBODIMENT IS A WAY WE HEAL THE PARTS OF US WE CALL THE SHADOW.

These are the parts of us that we repress, deny, blame, shame or judge. If you’re not sure which those are for you, take notice next time you get angry at someone, whether it’s for cutting you off on the road or it’s because they acted in a way you disliked. Whatever we get angry about is a direct reflection of our own shadow and the parts of us we disown.

For example, I once had a client who made a good amount of money.

No surprise, that wasn’t enough.

In fact, her deepest struggle was feeling like she could never stop working. She was a social worker who bent over backwards helping everyone out when they needed a shift covered, had a question or needed her advice. She was utterly spent, but had no idea how to say no. She literally couldn't get her mouth to say no to a request and set a boundary.

After a few sessions, we uncovered why. Her father put a ton of emphasis on never relying on someone else when she was young. She learned, from birth, to always provide for herself. And she also learned that being the one to provide for yourself was what made winners and successful people. She was rewarded, as a kid, for working the hardest, and punished for failing.

Therefore, as an adult, it’s programmed into her body to never receive help, never take a day off and never stop working.

Holy moly, how stressful that was for her!

Eventually, during our coaching, she asked for a mental health leave from work— which she got — and she spent that time writing, doing yoga, reading things she enjoyed, healing, crying, going to both therapy/coaching and uncovering parts of her heart she neglected.

In her case, the shadow was her helpless, needy inner child. We took it one step deeper, and called it the “homeless woman” within. The part of her that doesn’t make money, doesn’t work hard, and doesn’t even have a home.

Her embodiment assignments included writing poetry about this part of her, expressing her feelings through her movements, and pretending to be a homeless person (energetically).

Doing this kind of work actually targets these deeply routed beliefs about oneself so that then — and only then — you can CHOOSE whether or not you want to work endless hours.

Up until that point, it wasn’t a choice. Any part of you that you are neglecting, is running YOU. And it’s the most disempowered humans can be.

Here are some other examples:

  • If you’re run by perfectionism, you’ll never take big risks. The enemy of perfectionism is failure.

  • If you’re run by “being a strong woman who does it all,” you’ll never be in your feminine. The enemy of self-reliance is asking for help.

  • If you’re run by being financially independent, you’ll never stop working (and therefore neglecting self-care and people who matter to you). The enemy of financial independence is time wasted not making money.

Keep in mind, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to do things perfectly, working hard and being financially independent. The deeply-rooted struggles come from those qualities choosing YOU rather than you choosing those qualities. When those qualities choose YOU without you giving consent, they hold you back from so many pleasures in life…from taking risks, to falling in love, to investing in a big venture, to making new friendships, to traveling the world, and of course, to my absolute favorite, feeling all of your feelings.

Coming full circle...

EMBODIMENT IS WHAT YOU DO TO OWN (RATHER THAN DISOWN) PARTS OF YOU.

  • When you embody your inner brat, you welcome the part of you that has needs and desires.

  • When you embody your helpless feminine, you welcome the part of you that wants to be worthy of being taken care of.

  • When you embody your confidence, you may magically begin to feel the confidence.

  • When you embody you sacred slut, you will begin to feel the part of you that is indulgently sensual.

Embodiment can happen in many different ways. It can happen by turning on music and moving your spine like a cat on your mat (welcoming in your wild). It can happen by going to town punching your pillows and screaming (welcoming in your anger). It can happen by putting on a maid outfit and pretending to be your husband’s housecleaner when you finally realize “please pick up your socks!!!!” isn’t working (embodying play as a tool for communication).

To wrap this up here are 3 keys to how embodiment uniquely heals faster than affirmations:

  1. Embodiment is a form of demonstrating an energy within.

  2. Embodiment is how you welcome the repressed parts of you.

  3. Embodiment heals your beliefs 10X more effectively than anything that happens in the mind.

What's a shadow energy of yours you desire to heal? Share below plus add ONE way you can embody "her" or "him" today. 

Additional reading and listening:

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Womb Wisdom, Feminine Lineage and Stay-At-Home Retreats with Marya Stark

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Lessons from Years of Polyamory with Mikaal Bates