From the bottom of my heart, I’m in love with conversations around the Feminine and the Masculine and how to harmonize them. This is one of those topics I believe you have endless potential to learn from, so I decided, what better way to celebrate that than to have experts all around the world contribute their insights on it?

And viola, this post was born. I know many of you have been loving the conversations I’ve been having around the Feminine and the Masculine on my podcast, so I hope you can use this juicy piece of gold as a resource whenever you feel you’re relying too much on one of your energies, and possibly neglecting the other.

I know many perfectionist women who rely plenty on their masculine energy to feel worthy, and disregard any softness within, too fearful it will look like weakness. They gain worthiness by receiving recognition for their work ethic, drive, stability, self-orientation and “do it all” mentality. But is that really what their heart craves? To always be on the go, and never slowing down to simply be? To not lean into the softness?

On the flip side, I know many men who have let the media’s portrayal of what a “man” should be get in the way of them feeling their true feelings fully, even if that means feeling sad, emotional, hurt, soft, receptive or even insecure. There is shame attached to these emotions and that shame is what prevents them from ever truly feeling what needs to be felt. As I’m sure you can imagine, this build up of emotions can prevent one from stepping into their most true, authentic self.

All sides of the spectrum are valuable and necessary to truly feel it all- the whole enchilada. But, I truly believe there is an art to harmonizing these energies and that’s what this post is all about. Please enjoy these 31 tips on how to harmonize the Feminine and the Masculine, brought to you buy some really incredible people around the world. If you like what you read, I’d greatly appreciate if you share this post on social media or by shooting it to a friend!

31 Juicy Ways to Harmonize Your Feminine and Masculine

1. Maddy Moon of MaddyMoon.com

“If you want to harmonize your Masculine and Feminine energies to increase your confidence, start by knowing which one is going to help you the most to grow into the person you want to be. Sometimes what you need the most is support from your friends and community (the Feminine) and at other times you’re going to need to trust your gut regardless of what everyone else is saying (Masculine). One of the biggest changes I made in my life was to use both of these methods and not just one or the other.

For example, I used to ask everyone their opinion on how I lived my life, and eventually that led me to never follow my own intuition. I also went through a period of never asking anyone anything because I thought that would make me look weak.

Both of these “tapping in” strategies are incredible for awareness and growth. Use them both. Love them both. We need others and we need our intuition.”

2. JuVan Langford of JuVanLangford.com

“Authentic Communication is the key that unlocks the gifts that exist for the union of our masculine and feminine energies. Learning how to be alone is where you begin and generous listening is the fuel that keep the conversation flowing.”

3. Hanna Bier of HannaBier.com

“My favorite way to bring all parts of myself into harmony and express my full range, is by dancing wildly! I like to shake my body until my emotions flow, shake out any blocks or ideas around who I think I should be and I let myself be exactly as I am. Messy, brilliant, wonderful!”

4. John Kim of SHFT.us

“Gratitude.  What aspects am I grateful for in my masculine energy and what aspects am I grateful for in my feminine energy?  By appreciating and being grateful for your energy, you grow and promote it instead of judging it.  Judgment will set your energies off balance.  Gratitude will produce glue to bring both together.”

5. Layla Martin of Layla-Martin.com

“Visualize your inner feminine holding you with unconditional love and the offering of all the support that you need to thrive in your life. Feel your inner masculine holding you with unconditional love and the offering of all the support that you need to thrive in your life. When they both love and support you fully, harmony comes naturally.”

6. Philippe Lewis of Exquisite.Love

“Your masculine and feminine energy can be experienced as two different energetic/emotional aspects of you: The Brother, who relates to other men as “brothers”, and the Sister, who relates to other women as “sisters”. Because of how we are socialized as we grow up, one is usually less developed than the other. In some cases — especially those who didn’t engage socially with either boys and girls as they grew up — both need to be developed. The trick is to grow them to a degree that they feel mature and in graceful relationship to other brothers and sisters. Do you have close or best friends from the opposite sex? What about of the same sex? Do you have friendships with those you would normally perceive as “other” such that you can feel into them as a mirror for you, as another you?

This tip is simple yet rich: which of your inner Brother or Sister has the least friendships? Ask each of them. Then, consciously allow the one you picked to engage deeply with others and create these friendships such he/she can develop a more harmonious relationship with itself through relationships with others. This is not about “getting” anything from the relationship, but rather about connecting and engaging. Harmony will come from this practice.”

7. Thais Sky of ThaisSky.com

“Uncover what the feminine means to you. There are a lot of misconceptions about what being in your masculine or feminine means… and for every person it’s a little different. Start by noticing when you feel in your masculine and when you feel in your feminine. What are the differences? How do they leave you feeling? Once you start getting attuned to the sensations of each in your body, you will be able to tap into the energy you want.”

8. Drew Manning of Fit2Fat2Fit.com

“For me, harmonizing my feminine and masculine energy needs help from outside sources.  For example, by nature I’m a masculine dude that likes to lift heavy things and watch sports, but being a single Dad to two beautiful daughters, helps me lean into my more listening, nurturing and emotional side. I embrace both sides fully and understand that I am not one or the other, but both.  Living in the moment (via breathing and meditation) helps me tap into my masculine and feminine essence throughout the day.”

9. Megan Hale of Megan-Hale.com

“Our masculine energy often comes in the form of hustle, force, control, and specificity, but this isn’t the only way we can create change, reach desired outcomes or manifest our desires.  We can also lean into our feminine energy of trust, surrender, ease, and allowing.  In this way, we open ourselves to less stress and more miracles, less fear and more creativity, less rigidity and more flow.  By leaning into our feminine energy of input, we not only maximize our masculine energy of output, but dramatically shift how we experience the journey to creating change, reaching our goals and manifesting our desires.”

10. Justin Stenstrom of EliteManMagazine.com

“I find a balance in my life by making sure I surround myself with both masculine and feminine energy every day. For instance I love hanging around my guy friends and doing manly things like playing basketball, grabbing a few beers, and wrestling around with them. But I also love hanging with my girlfriend, talking to the women in my family, and having great conversations with the women I consider close friends. These two separate but complimentary energies keep me sane and happy in life and I recommend others find time for both.”

11. Chloe Elgar of ChloesCountertop.com

“I would suggest starting with becoming aware of your interpretation/attachment to masculine and feminine and then observing where you feel most comfortable and where you feel most weak/vulnerable: your masculine or feminine energy? The key is that this is not gender specific; I am a woman and I feel most weak and vulnerable in my feminine. I feel most in my power (control) in my masculine energy. So, in order to harmonize, I know that I must spend time doing activities that I associate with power- in my feminine. When this relates to work, it means choosing vulnerability, support and love in my spaces of work (speaking, hosting events and retreats). In my relationship, this means letting go of control and surrendering sometimes. Aka, letting my husband take the lead. Allowing myself to “lose control”.

If you are having a hard time deciding which energy you feel most connected to, here are some helpful prompts to pay attention to:
  • Which side of the bed do you sleep on?
  • What side of your body do you sleep on?
  • When you are lost, which way do you usually turn?

It is understood that the left side of the body is related to the feminine and the right side, the masculine. So, based on your answers to the above prompts- which are you most dominant in? What energy do you subconsciously rely on most?”

12. Mark Groves of MarkGroves.TV

“I find that people are often stuck in the far poles of either their masculine or their feminine… they don’t know how to create liquidity and flow between the two. This is usually because (1) We were wounded, so we deviate to our masculine to protect ourselves, or (2) We’ve never seen a good model of a harmonized human, or (3) We adopt an identity of what it means to be a “man” or a “woman”, and not letting ourselves just be. To be able to harmonize the energies heal your wounds were either or both. Find out why you fear the one you aren’t embracing. Learn to create boundaries instead of walls. The masculine and feminine find fluidity when we begin to step into the vulnerable space of creating that balance between expressing our needs, sharing our hearts and honouring ourselves.”

13. Connie Chapman of ConnieChapman.com

“Take time to understand the qualities of your feminine and masculine energy including how they feel, their strengths and how you express them, and then tap into that energy at different times. If your masculine is focused, strategic and hard-working, harness that when you need to knuckle down and get stuff done. However if your feminine feels intuitive, flowing and soft consciously choose to access her energy in your relationships, your creative hobbies, and in how you love and care for yourself.”

14. Kyle Lipton of Kyle Lipton

“Let go of what you think you should be and relax into who you truly are. There’s so many labels to these things. But in the end just be who YOU truly are at your core and relax into that.”

15. Carly Gross of CarlyMorganGross.com

“The masculine and feminine energies actually don’t need to be in balance. Why strive for 50/50 when what’s most natural, fulfilling, and dominant in you is either side?

First step in harmonization: Know your dominant essence. (If you are a woman, theres a 90% chance that your natural essence is in the feminine. Even if you’ve mastered the masculine for decades, your dominant essence is feminine if when you engage it it brings you peace, joy, and love.

Once you know that, bring this essence through you as much and as often as you can… even if you have to do some work to get there. (Let’s face it, its a masculine world, so those with a femme essence have to intentionally engage!)

Allow your less dominant essence to come up and through whenever you need, but you’ll find a greater level of harmony within yourself when you let go of trying to harmonize your masculine/feminine energies and simply allow your most dominant one to shine through.

Essentially, be what’s most natural to your inner being.

You are enough.”

16. TJ Anderson of The Art of Health Hacking

“Look at yourself in the mirror, breathe, smile, and make eye contact with yourself. And when you’re ready and it feels true…say…I love you. Self love never dies. And it can fuel the harmony between your yin and your yang.”

17. Trish Blackwell of TrishBlackwell.com

“As a natural extrovert with high energy and a passion for taking action and “getting the job done,” I learned quickly that if I didn’t pay attention, my masculine energy would bulldoze the effectiveness of what I was trying to achieve or build. At the time I was blind to the power of my feminine energy and unsure of how to honor it at the same time that I honored the masculine energy within me. Then, about ten years ago as I began diving deep into real self-awareness, I began implementing a daily consciousness towards prioritizing both my masculine energy and my feminine energy, allowing myself to feel and lean into each energy type at different times of the day. I believe that to best harmonize both energies you must know and understand the strengths that come with each energy, because, as you do, you can then tap more effectively into them and leverage a beautiful melody between them both.”

18. David Finch of DavidJFinch.com

“Perhaps the answer lies in understanding the nature of harmony in music. Harmony relies on the relationship between the notes of a musical phrase sounding simultaneously; without simultaneity, all harmony is lost. As in music, harmony between our concurring energies requires a clear sense of the melody. In any given situation, either our feminine or masculine energy will be the dominant expression, or “melody”; complementing that expression requires an awareness of one’s context (the key of the tune) as well as some sensitivity to how the melody might be strengthened within that context.”

19. Madeline Giles of AngelicBreathHealing.com

“Breathe slowly and deeply. Breath is consciousness, and breathing deeply helps us attune to our energy, intuition, and angels. When we are in tune with our energy, we are in harmony with our spirit – which is a uniquely tailored expression of masculine and feminine energy.”

20. Mark Shapiro of AreYouBeingReal.com

“Be a courageous and assertive baddass who walks the talk and surrenders to the flow, joy and tears of life.”

21. Sara Avant Stover of TheWayoftheHappyWoman.com

“Take time each day to do things that challenge you (masculine energy)–while also carving out space to rest, nurture yourself, and just “be” (feminine energy). You can then extend this to your weekly, monthly, and yearly planning. For example, enjoy tech-free Sundays with nothing on your calendar to balance out the exertion from your work week, or make sure to plan a couple of weeks of vacation or retreat time each year to relax, be in nature, and enjoy.”

22. Christopher Sunyata of ChristopherSunyata.com

“The masculine, as deep unmoving awareness from which you witness all of life, is consciousness itself.  The feminine, as everything else that moves and changes – thoughts, emotions, sensations, and your body is beheld and appreciated by the masculine. When you sit in meditation, empty the mind fully, and allow awareness to witness in love all that arises – your breath, heartbeat, aches and pains, noises in the space around you – continue feeling outward from your heart to the limits of your sensory awareness. When you move in sensual dance, abandon yourself to the delight and wonder of sensation, emotion, feeling everything through your body – withdraw or contract from none of it – instead melt open like a snowflake surrendering to the sun.”

23. Karsyn Dupree of Wldrnessa.com

“When I feel myself resisting to a circumstance or the touch of a loved one, I consciously tell my body and mind to soften. Reminding myself to slow down and feel my life as it’s happening has been a life-saver for my constantly-running masculine mind.”

24. Jator Pierre of WEHLC.com

“Would you consider; The key to balancing your masculine and feminine energies may be to ask yourself the following question.

How does a part of me benefit from being out of balance?”

Consider the possibility that aspects of our behaviors benefit our emotional neediness, we can benefit from being out of balance in a “negative” and or “positive” way. If we allow introspection of self i.e “How does a part of me benefit from being out of balance” we can come to an understanding of the consequences of our choices, and thus start to take full responsibility for our actions and reactions.  This perspective gives us a bird’s eye view on any “issue” arising in our lives and allows one to re-parent themselves into a new way of being, or repeating the old pattern with less shame and fear.  What if I said both paths are necessary?”

25. Simi Botic of SimiBotic.com

“Check in with yourself — you are the expert in what you need! For me, it isn’t typically a 50/50 balance, but more of an ebb and flow between the two that creates “balance” over a season (which could be a day, week, month, or specific project). I check in with myself regularly to ask, “what do I need to feel supported during this season?” If it is a season requiring more masculine energy, I crave activities, experiences, or practices that bring out my feminine side (or vice versa), which I can then prioritize.”

26. Josh Trent of Wellness Force Radio

“Man’s greatest motivating force is his desire to please women. The hunter who excelled during prehistoric days did so to appear great in the eyes of women. Man’s nature has not changed in this respect. The hunter of today brings home no skins of wild animals, rather wealth. Man has the same desire to please women that he had before the dawn of civilization; the only thing that has changed is his method of pleasing.” – The Napoleon Hill Foundation

“The intentionality around the word “pleasing” really just means “showing up for.” The money in our current society is, essentially, the spear. These inspirations for men are hardwired in our DNA regardless of the ever-expanding exploration of what the masculine/feminine energy space really is. I believe that true conscious relating honors both the beast and the spirit. To deny that men are men and women are women is to disrespect mother earth. I’m not saying that equality and co-creation don’t have a place, in fact, those qualities should lead. However, for real polarity and attraction to exist, men and women must relax into the knowing that what makes a man is fundamentally much different than what makes a woman.

For women, it’s so critical to allow your heart to remain open, filled with feminine grace, and flowing; even if the past has hurt you. It is when your heart is closed that masculine energy and tension​ will grow, which paradoxically attracts the less masculine, indecisive, flaky, and non-committal men your heart least desires. The balancing of masculine and feminine is a continuum, filled with moments to course-correct from two conscious souls who are willing and open to practicing happiness, letting go of control, and allowing their beast and spirit to dance.”

27. Ruby Fremon of iamru.by

“Whether you’re a female or a male, we’re all pre-programmed with both feminine and masculine energy. These energies work together to create a sense of harmony and balance in our lives. At times, you may require more masculine than feminine energy, while at other times you require more feminine. What matters is that you honor and accept that BOTH energies are needed to live a life that feels good. One tip to help you harmonize your feminine and masculine energy is to avoid the urge to resist the energies that come up. Your soul knows what it needs and when it needs it…let it decide which energy needs to come out and play and honor that decision through acceptance.”

28. Kylie McBeath of KylieMcBeath.com 

“The masculine creates the framework for the feminine to flow. The most important framework to honor and cultivate is our self-care practice. This framework allows us to connect with ourselves – emotionally & spiritually so that our feminine  essence flows with ease. When we have too many frameworks & rigidity, open up some inner space by beginning a meditation practice, journaling, or going for a walk in nature to let loose & enjoy the beauty of life.”

29. Shayna Hiller of ShaynaHiller.com

“Harnessing both energies is essential for health and peace of mind. If you tend to lean towards one direction (masculine or feminine), regardless of gender, consciously move into the opposite. For example, if you are an overworked corporate person, try ecstatic dance. If you are a weightlifter, go for a walk in nature. It is simple.”

30. Malaine Lea of MalaineLea.com

“Vulnerability is the key to success and where we access our power. Whether a man or woman we tend to shy away from stepping into our vulnerability thinking we will be dubbed, “weak” or “emotional” in essence, not enough. The truth is that through vulnerability we connect, and connection is our currency. The currency will translate in abundance various ways, including YOUR MONEY. So when you look at it this way you can’t afford to not be vulnerable.”

31. Libby Crow of LibbyCrow.com

“Remember, you are just like the waves of the ocean–sometimes soft, sweet, and dreamy–sometimes hard, crashing, and powerful. It’s up to you to choose how to flow in each moment. The art is in discerning which energy will allow you to stay afloat.”

Want more?

  • Listen to THIS podcast episode titled “Harmonizing the Feminine and the Masculine”
  • Listen to THIS audioguide titled “4 Pillars of Femininity for Perfectionists”
Do you have a tip you’d like to share? Comment and let us know below!

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